Conversation with a F*ckbuddy, Or how to Ruin the Arrangement

Monday, August 07, 2006

My good friend White Dade always says that you should never have an actual conversation with a f*ckbuddy. I learned the reason for this last week.

Matt is (was) a great guy, and really great in bed. I don't see him very frequently, but we follow every last one of the rules. At least we did until last week. Normally when we IM, it's to talk about all of the dirty things we are going to do to each other. But for some reason, he was chatty last week and IM'ed me. Somehow, our conversation went to politics, war and religion. NEVER, EVER talk to your fuck buddy about these subjects. It can never end well.

Truthfully, I already knew Matt is a republican, and an analyst or something for the CIA (it's not a pick-up line- I've seen the ID), so I should have just side-stepped the conversation, but I was feeling self-righteous, so I didn't. Wow, do I regret that.

Turns out my fuck buddy is not only a republican, but an extreme right-wing republican. He was seriously pissing me off. And he seems a little racist as well. According to him, all Muslims want to kill everyone that isn't Muslim, and I'm un-American for having Muslim friends. Grrrr!!! He's also pro-life, and I don't think I need to tell you what side of that fence I'm on, so there was an argument there, too. He's also against gay marriage. Even now, when I think about our conversation, I get more and more fired up.

The problem with all of this? I didn't care about his politics or even his thoughts before. Now, I can't stop thinking about how narrow-minded they are. This wouldn't be a problem if I wasn't sleeping with him. Now I don't know if I can ever hook up with the guy again. The fact that he has those views makes me cringe, and I don't know if I can let him touch me again.

My advise and strong warning: DO NOT TALK TO YOUR FUCK BUDDY ABOUT ANYTHING THAT MIGHT PISS YOU OFF! Chances are, you will not want to know their opinion. And even when you win the argument, you've still lost.

12 comments:

None 8/07/2006 03:24:00 PM  

As soon as I find one of those, I'll remember that.

J 8/07/2006 03:27:00 PM  

I didn't realize there were so many rules to the FB relationship, which is probably why I never kept one more than a month or two...

But I also didn't keep them as strangers. I always think its better if you generally would enjoy their company when not doing the deed... after all, you need to be able to talk to them and not be repulsed during recovery time, yes?

Ashburnite 8/07/2006 03:36:00 PM  

cody- def. remember that. No discussing politics with someone who's opinions you don't really care about. total turn-off.

prslave- yeah, it's pretty hard to keep them as strangers. this was the first one that I had been able to do that with. all of that work (not asking him personal questions) down the drain because he was feeling chatty.

Melissa 8/07/2006 03:40:00 PM  

Better to know though, don't you think? I wouldn't want a dick inside me that is attached to a body who is pro-life and a lunatic Crazy-Christian. I'll take my non-speaking vibe over that.

NotCarrie 8/07/2006 03:48:00 PM  

Oh man, I can definitely see how the talking could ruin the arrangement.

White Dade 8/07/2006 03:56:00 PM  

So sorry you had to learn the hard way. And there you were bragging aobut your greak f-buddy relationship. Tisk tisk.

Kirsten 8/07/2006 06:31:00 PM  

see...that's why I don't talk to mine...never mind the fact that I'm married to him....HAHAHAHa...We DON'T talk
Just kidding...its a hard lesson to have to learn, I guess...sorry you had to find that one out...And again, you make me glad to be married...LOL...I love ya girl
:)Kirsten

Tara 8/07/2006 06:57:00 PM  

Eeek, I would've had a problem with his take on things as well. Damn politics.

Anonymous,  8/08/2006 02:36:00 PM  

He's not disgusting he'a just unenlightened. And its not your job to enlighten him.

He's good in bed with no strings attached. That's not worth passing up over politics.

Eff him.

Anonymous,  8/08/2006 07:24:00 PM  

Wow, talk about learning a lesson! Could he have BEEN any less desirable in the personality department??

But you know, I think I read in the CityPaper that hardcore republicans can be completely irrepressible in bed. All those desires to dominate and control can come in handy when you're romping around in bed, I guess. ;)

Unknown 8/16/2006 11:36:00 AM  

The key is to prolong the aura of mystery for as long as possible. But now the mood is all wrong. I couldn't go back to a woman who felt this way. It's like a cold shower.

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