Always the Ex

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

I'm cursed. I know it sounds weird, but I must have pissed off someone in a previous life. I think you all know how bad my luck with men is. But what you don't know is that I am almost always a guy's last ex-girlfriend. It seems that a very large percentage of my ex's end up marrying the woman they date right after we break up. Don't believe me? Here's a break-down of the ones I know about:

  1. Chris B- he was my first boyfriend. We dated during 7th and 8th grade. He was also my first french kiss. After we broke up, he started dating Delicia. They dated through the rest of high school, and college, and got married after college. They are still married today.
  2. Rich N- we dated during 9th grade and part of 10th. He was the first guy to get to 3rd base with me. He dumped me to go out with Becky. They are still married.
  3. Jeremy S- part of 11th grade and 12th grade (he was in college). Of course, the girl he broke up with me to date was the one he married.
  4. Kris B- very long story. One of the 4 guys I've been head-over-heels in love with. But I'm not sure if he counts, since he cheated on me with her, got her pregnant, then married her. Either way, they are still together.
  5. Austin M- Junior year in college. I dumped him- he married the next girl he dated.
  6. Fabian C- Senior year in college. Another of my 4 real loves. Same story. Dumped me. Married to the next woman he dated.
  7. Chad S- The year after I graduated. Married.
  8. Adam O- dated him right after Chad and I broke up. Found out at the reunion that he started dated a girl a graduated with (Angie- a bitch), and they are now married.

These are only the ones that I know about. There have been a few guys that I've lost touch with. This may be why I panic after a break-up. Especially when I really care about the guy (ahem...MU).

So I think I should start a business. Make this into something positive.

Guys: want to meet the woman of your dreams?? Date me for a while. I guarantee that the next woman you date will be your dream girl.

I think I could make a fortune.


team gingerbread 7/25/2006 12:11:00 PM  

The only way it could be worse is if he were like my good friend's ex, who came out of the closet the day they broke up

minijonb 7/25/2006 03:12:00 PM  

reverse the curse! the next guy you break up with will inherit the curse. then you will marry the next guy you date after him. make it happen.

Ben 7/25/2006 03:14:00 PM  

That isnt worse, gingerbread, thats a goddamn blessing. Can you imagine the mess if your friend discovered that after they got married?

And Neurotic, are you my ex? I had an ex named tracy who had the same complaint. (Ironically, I married after her too).

Kirsten 7/25/2006 03:15:00 PM  

awwwwww....that's harsh ash...but I would probably feel the same hey...MGC isn't cheating on ya, girl...did you hear him yelling at me???lol..he is tooo cute, tho, isn't he...anyways..seeing as my puter is fried, who knows when I will be up and running again...but luckily, there is always the library...take care...:)
Just me

White Dade 7/25/2006 04:07:00 PM  

Wow. I guess tha;ts what oyu get for goign to High School in Hilljack dcountry, though. Those people all get married young. My college girlfriend got engaged to the first guy she dated after me (4 months later) although I have no idea if they are married or not.

Raincouver 7/25/2006 04:19:00 PM  

Ash - it probably just means that they realize their mistake of letting you go too late, so they marry to redeem themselves.

That's quite the resume, though!

Melissa Marie 7/25/2006 06:28:00 PM  

That's something that I kinda wonder about. I stopped Googling exes, and I don't keep in touch with any of them. There's one who contacts me every now and then. I still have some feelings for him, and I secretly hope he's not married (yet).

Anonymous,  7/25/2006 07:51:00 PM  

oh... how awful that must be! I'm sure someone's out there for you... You just have to wait... At least none of your exes broke up with you to be with the man they would get together with... And then they'd still be together until now. :)


Avin 7/25/2006 08:04:00 PM  

You and my bestfriend Suzanne have the exact same issue. I never keep up with what happens to dudes after I leave them, so I dont know if they ever pick up their nuts and move on to marriage or not. Go figure.

Pikkel Weezel 7/25/2006 08:44:00 PM  
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
nicole 7/25/2006 10:05:00 PM  

You're running an amazing man training service, Ash. They're all ready for the big leagues by the time they're out the door!

By the way, I think that's a brilliant idea for a business. :)

KassyK 7/25/2006 10:15:00 PM  

Agreed--Its a great idea for a sorry chica. I had a friend that was the "girlfriend" primer...none of them married the next girl but they all got serious with the next girl and she was their first girlfriend. Ay. You deserve someone great lovely and he is out there. Corny I know but I believe it. :-)

mgc 7/25/2006 10:36:00 PM  

i second minijonb's comment!

make it happen!

flic 7/26/2006 07:55:00 AM  

You're obviously a great launching pad!

And you must be teaching guys a few lessons that you might not be aware of.

You sound like you'd actually be great to be with!

Ben 7/26/2006 03:42:00 PM  

Did my comment get deleted? Did I offend? Apologies...

Ashburnite 7/26/2006 05:11:00 PM  

gbread- umm...I guess we've all had shitty break-ups.

mjb- I've certainly been trying.

ben-, I don't think I'm your ex :-)

kirsten- ouch...I know how much it sucks being without a computer. And yes, mgc is the cutest :-)

Ashburnite 7/26/2006 05:14:00 PM  

wd- true...that's what happens when you grow up in the sticks.

raincouver- aww...thanks, sugar. And "the Boss" is a lucky woman.

mm- yeah, I think I'll refrain from googling the next one(s). I wish I didn't know that they were all married.

mae- thanks. like I said to gbread, I guess we all have f*cked up ex-relationships.

Ashburnite 7/26/2006 05:16:00 PM  

avin- I need to start forgetting about them after the break-up. there are just some things I don't want to know.

nicole- I may as well turn my bad luck into a profit, right?

kk- thanks, hun. you're too sweet.

mgc- if only there were more men out there like you and mjb!!

Ashburnite 7/26/2006 05:18:00 PM  
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Ashburnite 7/26/2006 05:18:00 PM  

flic- awww...thank-you, hun. launching pad, huh? i like that view of it better than the "curse" view.

ben- no, it wasn't your comment I deleted. just some douche who keeps leaving idiotic comments

Rachel 7/26/2006 08:33:00 PM  

You and I are in the same boat NMR and S are both going to marry the chicks (engaged) to which they dumped me for. I hate being part of this club. Maybe it is just that we train them well. :-)

The Husband 7/27/2006 08:10:00 AM  

you should start a side consulting/dating service. you help the guys out then send them on their way so they can meet the love of their life.

JC 7/31/2006 08:25:00 AM  

write a book about it and i bet it'll be a hot seller...

Anonymous,  8/04/2006 02:25:00 PM  

Here are some links that I believe will be interested

TooMuchCoffeeLady 8/04/2006 03:43:00 PM  

If you really do go into business, would you consider taking on a woman as a client?

Nothing sexual, please, but we could go out on dates. Like stuffing our faces at the cheesecake factory, shoeshopping, going to see chickflicks starring 1/2 naked hot men... whaddaya say?

Just kidding, totally straight here, but could use some good luck in love for once in my life.

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